That Bearded Mofo

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Critics Are Saying

Published Thu Oct 4, 2012 6:00pm PST

image shaved off

The first 2012 Presidential Debate is in the books and the reviews are in. Let's see what everyone is saying.

"Expertly moderated."
— Milton Waddams, Office Space image shaved off

"We give Romney two trillion dollars stars up."
— U.S. military budget

"Obama should change his name to Matt, the way he lied down for Romney."
Chris Matthews, MSNBC image shaved off

"Ruck Fomney."
— Big Bird, Sesame Street

"What's really going on behind those podiums?"

"Good for Romney for calling out Obama for repeating his version of Romney over and over again as if it's the truth."
Pot, Kettle, and Exploding Head Weekly

"What the heck am I?"
— Simpson-Bowles

"It seems like Hollywood churns one of these out every four years. Where's the originality?"
— Codger Rebert, Chicago Fun-Times

"Romney's details are A+."
— Some Guy at a place that time

"An absolutely terrible anniversary gift."
— Kay Jewelers

"An absolutely terrible anniversary gift. Obama should've went to Jared."
— Jared, the Galleria of Jewelry

"Back off, Jared. Every kick your ass begins with Kay!"
— Kay Jewelers

"Romney says Spain and the U.S. spend 42% of their economy on government, but Romney should steer clear of saying forty-something percent about anything."
— 47% of Americans

"Obama was so wimpy that he's going to gladly pay Romney Tuesday for a hamburger today."
Chris Matthews, MSNBC image shaved off

"Not enough chairs."
— Clint Eastwood

"Romney wins, Obama devil."
FOX News

"I laughed. I cried. But I was watching Futurama."
— Low Information Voter

"Romney likes coal. Coal thinks Romney's just okay."
Fifth Grade Note Passers Digest

"Obama shaved off his Hitler mustache because he went into hiding after 9/11. Keep government out of my Medicare."
— Mason Jones, Tea Partier and true American

"China doesn't cheat. And Romney will pay for his insolence."
— Hu Jintao, President of China/Creditor of United States

"I can't afford to retire."
— 10-year-old textbook

"Why didn't Obama mention me?"
— Random Person from the Black community

"Obama, look at me. Look at me... What the f*ck, man?"
Chris Matthews, MSNBC image shaved off

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