And Now Lighthearted Trivia From The Joker Beast...
Light It Up, Superbowl Champ.
Light It Up.
Superbowl Champ.
Light It Up.
Superbowl Champ.
Nope, no matter how many times I say it, it just don't sound right. [shrug] Anyway, congratulations all the same.
As usual, we had a very interesting draft. Let me hurry up and finish this article before the computer auto-writes it for me.
Some of us drafted players who were cut...
T.J. Houshmanzadeh, Team Perfection, Round 8
Kris Brown, Hitmen, Round 10
Shayne Graham, The Joker Beast, Round 11
Some of us drafted players way down on the depth chart...
Marshawn Lynch, Gridy, Round 4
Brandon Lloyd, Team Perfection, Round 11
Some of us drafted players others wanted...
Matt Schaub, Madden Curse, Round 1
Calvin Johnson, Savage Life, Round 1
Some of us drafted players no one wanted...
Brandon Jacobs, Dub, Pope, Round 5
Jacoby Jones, Gladiators, Round 5
And some of us plain don't like Reggie Wayne...
Hates His Muthaf*ckin Guts, STLiens, After The Draft
But The Draft is just the draft. And what a difference a day can make. Housh got signed by the Ravens. Well just f*ck me and Anquan Boldin, whydon'tcha! And this week they go against the Jets who re-signed Revis the same day. Well just f*ck me and Anquan Boldin, whydon'tcha!!!
No telling what the season has in store.
Whoops! I think the computer just picked Lawrence Taylor for my team. Let's wrap things up with a little...
Lighthearted Trivia
With Eli Manning and Donovan McNabb on his roster, footBALLS DEEP has as many NFC East quarterbacks as he did wins last season.
Six quarterbacks named Matt were drafted this season (including Matthew Stafford). But only one is Matt Schaub, so I assume the other five were picked by mistake.
Madden Curse will confuse Mike Williams (TB) and Mike Wallace (PIT) at least 3 times this season. It's easy to remember. Wallace doesn't have Roethlisberger throwing the ball to him.
Savage Life's three WRs Chad Ochocinco, Calvin Johnson, and Dez Bryant are past, present, and future. Ghost of T.O. Past, Ghost of T.O. Present, and Ghost of T.O. Future...
Team Perfection has Brandon Lloyd. ... Who is that?
STLiens' roster consists of RBs Ryan Mathews, Ricky Williams, and Tim Hightower. Only one of those is the number 1 guy on his NFL team. STLiens' WRs consist of Reggie Wayne, Jeremy Maclin, Pierre Garcon, and Derrick Mason. Only one of those is the number 1 guy on his NFL team.
No, seriously, who the hell is Brandon Lloyd?
Diablo Negro stands for "Black Devil". Which is what I used to call Ronnie Brown when he got hurt every year.
As of today, Hitmen has only 1 RB and 1 WR not on bye week 9. But he'll still have Peyton Manning who is really really good and has THE number 4 ranked WR according to everyone's fantasy boards. I mean everyone's. There is no one who would shit on Peyton's top receiver. No one. Really good numbers. I can't think of his name right now.
With Brees & Bush, Jacobs & Smith, and Wells & Fitzgerald, Dub, Pope has more pairs of teammates than Kat Stacks has pairs of underwear. Unless you count the pairs of rappers' underwear that she owns. In which case, not close. Not close.
The Joker Beast drafted 7 of his top 31 ranked players. And no one cares. That... That makes him nervous.
Any team that would draft Derek Anderson isn't serious about a repeat.
Gridy has two players with cities in their name: Miles Austin and Dallas Clark. He also has two players with names that can be associated with the road: Miles Austin and Donald Driver. He's also gonna lose week 1.
And that's all the lighthearted trivia I have. Everyone, enjoy the bliss that is Draft Day afterglow. Come Thursday night, it gets real.
I'm beatin' niggas like I beat paternity tests. You're up first, Gridy.
~Joker Beast~